1. Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office: “Dr.. Jones, at your cervix.”

  2. In a Podiatrist’s office: “Time wounds all heels.”  (read it again)

  3. On a Septic Tank Truck:  Yesterday’s Meals on Wheels

  4. At a Proctologist’s Office: “To expedite your visit, please back in.”

  5. At an Optometrist’s Office: “If you don’t see what you’re looking for,
    you’ve come to the right place.”

  6. On a Plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.”

  7. On another Plumber’s truck:Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”

  8. On a Church’s Bill board:  “7 days without God makes one weak.”

  9. At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:  “Invite us to your next blowout.”

  10. At a Towing company: “We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.”

  11. On an Electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”

  12. In a Non-smoking Area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”

  13. On a Maternity Room door: “Push. Push. Push.”

  14. On a Taxidermist’s window: “We really know our stuff.”

  15. On a Fence: “Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!”

  16. At a Car Dealership:  “The best way to get back on your feet -miss a car payment.”

  17. Outside a Muffler Shop: “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

  18. In a Veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

  19. At the Electric Company: “We would be delighted if you send in your payment.However, if you don’t, you will be.”

  20. In a Restaurant window:  “Don’t stand there and be hungry;come on in and get fed up.”

  21. In the front yard of a Funeral Home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

  22. At a Propane Filling Station: “Thank heaven for little grills.”

  23. At a Chicago Radiator Shop: “Best place in town to take a leak.”

  24. Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck: “Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises”



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